Just Another New Year’s Post
I bet, in your debilitating post-holiday exhaustion, you were scrolling your feed hoping for yet another New Year’s post. So you’re welcome.
I sort of wrote down my goals for the new year while I laid in bed at 11pm with my cats on New Year’s Eve. I figured no one cares what my goals are, especially since they aren’t really anything new. So I thought my hot take would be to tell all of you, lovely friends and family, what my goals for you are. I promise this won’t be as condescending as it sounds.
1. Ask for help
You’d be surprised how many people enjoy showing their love by helping you. Don’t take advantage of people, but don’t hesitate to ask. If you’re being asked for help, consider the balls it might be taking to ask. Give as much as you can until it becomes detrimental to your own health.
2. Reach out
Social media gets a lot of flak this time of year because everyone is trying to embrace more time “unplugged.” That’s cool, I respect that. But also recognize the value in technology and use it to STAY connected. Say hi to friends that you don’t see often, especially those that are far away. Tell someone you’re thinking of them, send them a picture that reminds you of them, fart into their voicemail for all I care. You never know when someone needs to be reminded that they are important to you and that you cross their mind. If you’re super anti-technology, write them a goddamn letter. Or a postcard if a letter takes too long.
Sometimes I hesitate to reach out to people I’m thinking about because 1) I’m too busy or 2) I worry they’re too busy. Connecting doesn’t always need to be a 3 hour Skype call.
3. Write more
You don’t have to be good. You don’t have to show anyone. When you’re sad or overjoyed or bored, try writing. It’s extremely cathartic if nothing else.
4. Recognize privilege
I am lucky and privileged and if you are reading this there is a good chance you are too. Recognize that, and use your privilege to help others. Learn about other cultures, other lives, other experiences. It will be uncomfortable. Notice that and ask why.
5. Do what feels good: food
Eat what you crave. Stop when you don’t want it anymore. Listen to your body and its needs. Listen to your body and how it feels after certain foods. Try new foods. Stop making food rules. Cook! Overeat at your favorite restaurant and cherish every bite, it’s worth the stomachache. Make food for the ones you love. Make food with the ones you love. Stop shaming yourself for food you love. Stop shaming others for eating what they want. Stop the diet talk, you don’t need to deserve or earn food, just eat it.
6. Do what feels good: movement
Hey, this is really similar to the last one! Move your body in the way it wants. Stop when you don’t want it anymore. Listen to your body and its needs. Listen to your body and how it feels after certain types of movement. Try new forms of movement. Stop making exercise rules. Walk! Push yourself really hard at a workout and see how you feel after, it might be worth the soreness. If you hate it, never do it again. Encourage the ones you love to move in whatever way they enjoy. Move with the ones you love. Stop shaming yourself for missing workouts or not working out hard enough. Stop shaming others for not moving in the way or as often as you enjoy. You should never be moving to make up for “too much” food or to earn food, you should move because it feels good.
7. Have more compassion
Try putting yourself in others shoes. And treat yourself as you would treat a loved one. Give your loved ones space. Give them time. Give them a break. And do the same for yourself. You are allowed to feel. It’s ok to feel sad for no reason. It’s ok to open up about feelings and it’s ok to need to process.
Compassion is such an important part of each of these goals. I’ve been trying really hard to treat myself like I would treat a loved one and TBH that is why I wrote this post as goals for my loved ones versus myself. It’s easier for me to tell others to follow these paths than to do it myself, but I’m working on it. Hopefully these give you some more ideas about how to respect others, yourself and your body, in two thousand noin-teen.